You're crazy, I'm crazy

The world is fragmented and everybody concentrates on their own areas of interest and disregards or dismisses tangental factors.

We live in fragmented realities. It is easier to see in others than ourselves. I can look at my ex with her current 2010 complaints of a possible rare and incurable ailment and see little difference with her complaints of a different 1990's possible rare and incurable ailment, and I'm sure ten or twenty years from now she will complain of another possible rare and incurable ailment.

(My ex has many other fine qualities and is an overall great person, and I have many flaws and faults of my own which I will discuss in depth in the near future. In real life we can't talk about reality, I couldn't say these things to her as she would grow defensive and react by attacking me--arguing with me, belittling me, etc, etc, resulting in negative progress on all fronts. I have asked others to point out the same type of flaws and logical inconsistencies about me, but they usually won't, obviously fearing that I will grow defensive and react aggressively. -- Think about that little phrase I just threw in there, it means a lot -- "In real life we can't talk about reality..." I am writing anonymously and honestly here, take heed!)

She needs people to express compassion, she is very needy, and she is my ex. But I grasp her as an example only to illustrate a larger point and only because of my familiarity with the subject.)

Cognitive dissonance. Where a belief trumps a fact. You know something, but a belief over-rides what is known as a fact. Two or three examples...

The classic example is of some primitive peoples believing that killing a certain species of animal would cause rainfall. "The Indians thought that killing a buffalo would bring rain" and that type of thing.

A more moden example is a cult believing that an alien goddess would visit on a certain date. After the date passed some members left the group but others created rationales and stayed. "The goddess is pleased with our devotion and she has postponed her appearance."

Basic logic and appreciation of reality make these situations unacceptable to most people. To an extent, not realizing our own absurd tendencies is a type of cognitive dissonance. My ex, if she did serious self-analysis, would clearly see that an individual with her tendencies is rather pathetic and, by spending so much time and energy generating pity, is not utilizing her abilities to their fullest.

Let's leave my ex out of this for a minute and cite a few of my relatives. My mother is extremely arrogant and passive-agressive and she also often plays the pity card. She will say, "Oh, I can't do anything right." But as soon as she is out of sight she will secretly try to "fix" a minor problem that you mentioned ... usually with disastrous consequences. She can cite the fact of her numerous blunders, but she firmly believes that she is more skillful and intelligent than any other person she has ever meet--and she acts on that belief despite the vast amount of data contradicting those beliefs.

A cousin, who is fairly intelligent and works in a mid-level labor job and makes a comfortable living, but he always mentions going back to school, or starting a business, or investing in something, or fixing something up ... But none of these things ever come to pass, there are cars to be worked on in the garage and the house needs serious work, and in his mind one day all of these things will be taken care of ... now some of this is laziness, true, but some is slightly delusional. But they are delusions he truly believes. He believes he is industrious, but he doesn't need to accomplish anything, he just needs to believe he will accomplish all of these things one day. Of course, when he finally has to admit to himself that 'one day' has come and gone, he will find a new rationale.

So my thoughts on the human mind and the causes of our actions have prompted me to start this blog. I should have called it "You're crazy, I'm crazy" after that old book 'You're OK, I'm OK' because it means the same thing to me. Obviously, I am applying these same thoughts to a little examination of myself and my tendencies, and I see the most similarity with my cousin, to a lesser degree. I always see myself as a writer. I am not working for a publication or taking a class or working on a project, so ... so I'm not currently actively writing, and I need to change that.

So I am here to be doing something. I am here to write something significant about myself or society. I am not only here to write though, I am here to learn something significant about myself or society, and I am here to change something significant about myself or society. The pen is mightier than the sword.

Take care, I'll be back,

Grey Wolf